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Eternal Tease
I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
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Correction Years
Husband: For the last 28 years, all you've done is find mistakes in anything I say. Wife: 29 years...
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Love or Money?
Would you have married me if I didn't inherit a fortune from my father? Honey, I would have married you no matter who left you a fortune.
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Wardrobe Negotiations
My wife is always stealing my T-shirts and sweater… but if I take one of her dresses… suddenly… "we need to talk."
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Cocktail Promise
What did the bartender say to his date? Alcohol you later?
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Marital Revelation
My wife and I were happy for 25 years… and then we met.
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