Relationship Jokes

30 relationship dad jokes. You asked for it.

Selective Hearing Hall Of Fame

My wife complains I don't listen… or something like that.

Wife Marriage Listening+2

🙄0😂0

Jungle Tier Membership

What do you call two monkeys that share an Amazon account? Prime mates.

Shopping Relationship

🙄0😂0

Two Lovely Decades Apiece

My wife and I were happy for 25 years… and then we met.

Marriage Wife Relationship+1

🙄0😂0

Self Improvement Loophole

My girlfriend makes me want to be a better person so I can get a better girlfriend.

Dating Relationship Romance

🙄0😂0

Domestic Diplomacy

Marriage is the only war in which you sleep with the enemy.

Marriage Wife Love+1

🙄0😂0

A Love Story In Degrees

I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

Marriage Wife Love+2

🙄0😂0

Conversational Asymmetry

Funny how they say we need to talk... when they really mean you need to listen.

Communication Relationship Marriage

🙄0😂0

Two Bad Bets

Women marry hoping he'll change... Men marry believing she won't... Both are wrong!!!

Marriage Wife Husband+1

🙄0😂0

Settled Long Ago

I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always!

Marriage Wife Arguments+2

🙄0😂0

Rule One Of Engagement

A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after is the beginning of a new argument.

Argument Marriage Relationship+2

🙄0😂0

Wedding Toast Edition

Love one another! If it doesn't work, just interchange the last two words.

Love Marriage Relationship+2

🙄0😂0

Optometry Saved Me

It was love at first sight. Then I took a second look!

Love Romance Dating+1

🙄0😂0

Low Bar Romance

A man's idea of serious commitment is usually, 'Oh alright, I'll stay the night.'

Men Commitment Relationship+1

🙄0😂0

Translation Services

The best thing about women is how they can tell you what you really meant to say.

Women Wife Marriage+2

🙄0😂0

Unwinnable Quiz

No man has ever won a game of "Notice anything different about me?"

Women Relationship Haircut

🙄0😂0

Same Lighter Different Habit

Marriage and smoking are similar. You start because you want to and you continue because you have to.

Marriage Commitment Relationship

🙄0😂0

Brain Imbalance Detected

Why do men like smart women? Opposites attract.

Women Attraction Marriage+1

🙄0😂0

Procedural Marital Combat

My wife and I had a two-hour fight about whether or not we were fighting.

Marriage Wife Fight+2

🙄0😂0

Two-Person Comedy Act

My wife and I share a sense of humor. We have to. She doesn't have one.

Wife Marriage Humor+2

🙄0😂0

Selective Memory Loss

I'll never forget the first time we met... But I'll keep trying!!!

Memory Romance Relationship

🙄0😂0

Survival 101

If your partner asks, 'Do you love your phone more than you love me?' Lie!

Relationship Phone Love

🙄0😂0

Couch Diplomacy

Relationship between men and women is psychological. She is psycho and he is logical.

Relationship Men Women+2

🙄0😂0

Produce Aisle Politics

If he doesn't appreciate your fruit jokes you let that mango.

Fruit Relationship Dating

🙄0😂0

Brewed Just Right

Why are men like coffee? The finest ones are rich, hot, and keep you awake all night.

Coffee Men Compliment+2

🙄0😂0