THE 35-YEAR MUSIC RULE

By age 35 you should hate the last three albums by your favorite band.

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I'm retired in the sense that I was tired yesterday and I am tired again today.

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The older you get, the more you need to keep a fire extinguisher close to the cake.

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If you think the music is too loud, you're too old!!

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Aging gracefully means you're slowly starting to look worse.

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Once you reach a venerable age... You just need 1 candle on your cake for one more year on Earth!

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I always take life with a grain of salt. And a slice of lemon. And a shot of Tequila.

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