IMPROVEMENT MOTIVATION

My girlfriend makes me want to be a better person so I can get a better girlfriend.

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My wife complains I don't listen… or something like that.

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I was going to donate blood today, but they always ask way too personal questions. Who's blood is this? Where did you get it?

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Some people are like clouds. When they go away, it's a brighter day.

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I'm not arguing, I'm just telling you why you are wrong.

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I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

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If I promise to miss you, will you go away?

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