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Animals Jokes

108 animals dad jokes. You asked for it.

Sophishticated

Sophishticated

What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie? Sofishticated.

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Ele-Phone Trouble

Ele-Phone Trouble

What do you call an elephant in a telephone booth? Stuck!

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Moo-vie Night

Moo-vie Night

Where do cows go on Friday nights? To the moo-vies.

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Hive Mystery

Hive Mystery

What do you call a beehive without an exit? Unbeeleavable.

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Spotted Leopard

Spotted Leopard

Why can't a leopard hide? Because he's always spotted.

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Selfish Crustaceans

Selfish Crustaceans

Why don't crabs give to charity? Because they're shell-fish.

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Twin Tentacles

Twin Tentacles

What do you call two octopuses that look the same? Itenticle.

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Salty Sneeze

Salty Sneeze

Why do fish live in salt water? Because pepper makes them sneeze.

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Frog's Fate

Frog's Fate

What happens to an illegally parked frog? It gets toad away!

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Dance Paw-blem

Dance Paw-blem

Why aren't dogs good dancers? Because they have two left feet.

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Musical Chickens

Musical Chickens

Why did Beethoven get rid of his chicken? All they said was 'Bach, Bach, Bach, โ€ฆ'

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Breakfast Commitment

Breakfast Commitment

Ham & Eggs, a day's work for a chicken and a lifetime commitment for a pig.

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Radioactive Feline

Radioactive Feline

I saw a radioactive cat. It's got eighteen halflives.

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Rabbit Vision

Rabbit Vision

How do you know that carrots are good for your eyesight? Have you ever seen a rabbit wearing glasses?

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Educational Safari

Educational Safari

I liked the elephant school, I enjoyed the rhino college, but my favorite was the hippo campus

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Qualification Query

Qualification Query

Why aren't koalas actual bears? They don't meet all the koalafications.

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Shared Prime

Shared Prime

What do you call two monkeys that share an Amazon account? Prime mates.

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Chicken Humor

Chicken Humor

It'll be a minute before I get hard. I just got laid by a chick.

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Canine Silence

Canine Silence

I asked my dog what's two minus two, he said nothing.

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Typo Pun

Typo Pun

A priest, an imam and a rabbit walk into a blood bank. The rabbit says: I think I might be a Type-O.

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Martial Pork

Martial Pork

What should you call a pig who knows karate? A pork chop!

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Spelling Contest

Spelling Contest

What creature is smarter than a talking parrot? It's the spelling bee.

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Weight Comparison

Weight Comparison

What's the difference between a Hippo and a Zippo? One is really heavy and the other? A little lighter!

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