Success Jokes

18 success dad jokes. You asked for it.

Aquatic Vowel Shortage

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A FSH!

FishSpellingOcean+1

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One-Take Hobbies

If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you.

SkydivingSuccessFailure

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Say Yes First

When you are asked if you can do a job, tell ’em, ‘Certainly I can!’ Then get busy and find out how to do it.

JobWorkCareer+2

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The Secret Ratio

Confidence is 10% hard work and 90% delusion.

ConfidenceWorkSuccess

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Detour Ahead

The road to success is always under construction.

SuccessRoadConstruction+2

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Cancel The Uber

Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time.

TimeTravelPatience+1

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Just Because Theyre Quiet

Just because you're paranoid doesn't mean they aren't after you.

StrategySuccess

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Promotion Mechanics

The secret to success is to know who to blame for your failures.

SuccessBlameFailure+2

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Status Report From The Ledge

So far, so good. So far, so good. So far, so good. So far, so good.

OptimismSuccessPersistence+1

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Crab Bucket Theory

Everybody loves success but they hate successful people.

SuccessWork

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Reframe Department

Sometimes you succeed and other times you learn…

SuccessFailureLearning+2

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Held The Line At Zero

I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.

MoneyWealthSuccess+1

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The Recliner Doctrine

Minimum momentum makes maximum miracles.

MotivationSuccess

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Undefeated Champion

Not trying to brag or anything... But I have never lost in the Olympics.

SportsSuccess

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Wealth Strategy, Cushion Edition

To be in the 1%, you gotta do what the 99% don't... like hide the remote!

WealthMoneySuccess+1

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Step One Acquired

I'm proud to announce that I've completed the first item on my bucket list: I have the bucket.

GoalsSuccess

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Spreadsheet Self-Help

If you improve just 1% daily, compound growth will make you 37 times better by year's end.

GrowthSuccessHabits

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Victory Lap, Ankle High

Yesterday, I wore something from 5 years ago, and it still fit! I'm so proud! Okay... It was just socks, but still!

ClothesAgingSuccess+1

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