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Late Edition

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Wildcard

No theme, no warning. Dad picks whatever made him laugh in the garage this week.

163 jokes

Geology rocks but geography's where it's at.

Earth Science Smackdown

Jun 7, 2026

I dated a zombie once. When we broke up, she fell apart.

Reanimated Romance

Jun 6, 2026

Please keep me in your thoughts and prayers. Nothing's wrong. I'm just a narcissist.

Send Help, Mostly Applause

Jun 4, 2026

I could agree with you but then we would both be wrong.

Respectful Standoff

Jun 2, 2026

I know I am intelligent because I know that I know nothing.

Socrates in Slippers

May 31, 2026

Why did I walk into the kitchen again? Oh right, I need to forget. I need to forget seven times to remember once!

The Kitchen Mystery

May 30, 2026

I only know 25 letters of the alphabet. I don't know U.

Missing One Letter

May 28, 2026

Every tattoo is temporary because we are all slowly dying.

Fine Print on Ink

May 26, 2026

What's a good sign that you're going insane? I'm asking for an imaginary friend.

Second Opinion Required

May 24, 2026

A mind is like a parachute. It doesn't work if it is not open.

Cleared for Landing

May 23, 2026

Enter an 11-digit prime number to continue.

Password Hostage

May 21, 2026

It takes a lot of balls to golf the way I do.

Driving Range Confessional

May 19, 2026

I figured out how to make a million dollars on the stock market. Invest 2 million.

Foolproof Finance Strategy

May 17, 2026

Green is my all-time favorite color. I love it even more than blue and yellow combined.

Color Wheel Loyalty

May 16, 2026

What's the difference between one yard and two yards? A fence!

Property Line Mathematics

May 14, 2026

I don't understand why people hate lazy people. They didn't do anything.

Crime of Doing Nothing

May 12, 2026

I wanna be 16 again so I can ruin my life differently.

Same Wreck, New Paint

May 10, 2026

If a Viking is reincarnated… is he Bjorn again?

Norse Code

May 9, 2026

I don't work here. I'm a consultant.

Billable Loitering

May 7, 2026

Were any famous men born on your birthday? No, only little babies.

Birth Records Request

May 5, 2026

We don't approve political jokes. We've seen too many get elected.

Editorial Standards

May 3, 2026

I wasn't originally going to get a brain transplant but then I changed my mind.

Second Opinion

May 2, 2026

Why did the dad roll down the hill in a tractor tire? Because it was a wheel-y good idea!

Tractor Tire Test Drive

Apr 30, 2026

Latest survey shows that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the world's population.

Poll Results Are In

Apr 28, 2026