Irony Jokes

77 irony dad jokes. You asked for it.

Skydiving Logic

You don't need a parachute to go skydiving. You need one only if you go skydiving twice.

Skydiving Adventure Irony+1

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Secret Sharing

Your secret is safe with me… I wasn't even listening.

Sarcasm Irony Friendship+2

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Communist Flags

Communism was doomed from the beginning. Did they miss all the red flags?

Politics Historical Satire+2

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Knowledge Debate

What's the difference between ignorance and apathy? I don't know and I don't care.

Sarcasm Wordplay Irony+2

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Vacuum Sales

I finally decided to sell my vacuum cleaner. All it was doing was gathering dust.

Wordplay Household Satire+2

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Procrastination Advice

Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.

Procrastination Irony Satire+2

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Time Wealth

I cannot afford to waste my time making money.

Irony Money Work+2

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Temperature Logic

If you're hotter than me… then it means I'm cooler than you.

Weather Self-Deprecating Irony+2

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Lazy Fact

Lazy people fact #875437255. You were too lazy to read that number.

Procrastination Observational Satire+2

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Socratic Intelligence

I know I am intelligent because I know that I know nothing.

Intelligence Philosophy Irony+1

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Solo Consultation

Of course I talk to myself, sometimes I need expert advice.

Self-Deprecating Irony Sarcasm+2

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Agreement Avoidance

I could agree with you but then we would both be wrong.

Sarcasm Disagreement Conversational+1

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Debate Clarification

I'm not arguing, I'm just telling you why you are wrong.

Sarcasm Communication Relationships+2

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Doors 101

When life closes a door, just open it again. It’s a door, that’s how they work.

Life Philosophy Motivation+2

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Fitness Fuel-up

My favorite machine at the gym is the vending machine.

Fitness Food Irony+2

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The Arrogance of Knowledge

People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do.

Sarcasm Knowledge Irony+2

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Laughter on the Sidewalk

Everything is funny, as long as it’s happening to somebody else!

Irony Observational Sarcasm

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Grammar Grumbles

I hate it when people don't know the difference between your and you're. There so stupid.

Language Satire Irony+2

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The Expectation Paradox

Doesn't expecting the unexpected make the unexpected become the expected?

Philosophy Wordplay Irony+2

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Lazy Logic

I don't understand why people don't like lazy people. They didn't do anything.

Wordplay Procrastination Logic+1

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The One-Time Error

I've only been wrong once, and that's when I thought I was wrong.

Confidence Doubt Mistake+1

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The Irony of Superstition

It's bad luck to be superstitious!

Irony Wordplay

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Double Trouble Day

Today was a terrible day... my ex got hit by a bus, and I lost my job as a bus driver.

Dark Humor Irony Transportation

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The End of the Drop

It's not the fall that kills you... It's the sudden stop at the end.

Dark Humor Sarcasm Irony+1

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