Sarcasm Jokes

92 sarcasm dad jokes. You asked for it.

Dreamy Talent

I'm so good at sleeping I can do it with my eyes closed.

Sleep Irony Sarcasm+2

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IQ Misunderstanding

My IQ Test Results came back… They were negative.

Intelligence Self-Deprecating Sarcasm+1

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Life's Recipe

I always take life with a grain of salt. And a slice of lemon. And a shot of Tequila.

Drinks Life Philosophy+1

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Self-Response

Don't you hate it when someone answers his own questions? I do.

Self-Reference Irony Sarcasm+1

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Selective Hearing

My wife complains I don't listen… or something like that.

Relationships Misunderstanding Communication+2

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Time Tracking

They used to time me with a stopwatch. Now, they use a calendar.

Age Time Self-Deprecating+2

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Wedding Costs

Dad, how much it costs to get married? No idea, I'm still paying.

Dad Family Marriage+2

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Self-Centered Toys

Russian dolls are so full of themselves.

Wordplay Toys Culture+1

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Blood Mystery

I was going to donate blood today, but they always ask way too personal questions. Who's blood is this? Where did you get it?

Donation Blood Questions+2

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Constipation Concern

Can you die from constipation? I'm a little worried about how full of shit you are…

Insult Sarcasm Health

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Speech Envy

Is your bottom jealous of the amount of crap that comes out of your mouth?

Insult Sarcasm Adult

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Secret Sharing

Your secret is safe with me… I wasn't even listening.

Sarcasm Irony Friendship+2

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Improvement Motivation

My girlfriend makes me want to be a better person so I can get a better girlfriend.

Relationships Self-Improvement Sarcasm+1

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Friendly Boss

Don't think of me as a boss, think of me as a friend who can fire you.

Work Sarcasm Employment+1

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Golfing Balls

It takes a lot of balls to golf the way I do.

Sports Self-Deprecating Sarcasm+1

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Meditative Advice

You should try meditation. It's at least better than sitting and doing nothing?

Mental Health Wellness Lifestyle+2

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Knowledge Debate

What's the difference between ignorance and apathy? I don't know and I don't care.

Sarcasm Wordplay Irony+2

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Usefulness Perspective

Don't ever think you're completely useless. You can always be used as a bad example.

Sarcasm Motivation Life+1

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Fool's Day

Today is April's Fool Day. Believe nothing and trust no one… just like another day.

Sarcasm Trust Travel+1

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Pointless Geometry

What did the Triangle say to the Circle? You're pointless!

Math Wordplay Sarcasm

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Pizza Warning

Don't bite off more than you can chew unless it's pizza.

Food Pizza Sarcasm+1

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Warning Role

It could be that your purpose is to serve as a warning for others.

Insult Warning Sarcasm+2

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Weekend Goal

My goal for the weekend is to move just enough so people don't think I'm dead.

Procrastination Weekend Lifestyle+2

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Cloudy People

Some people are like clouds. When they go away, it's a brighter day.

Satire Sarcasm Relationships+2

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