CAREER DAD JOKES

22 career dad jokes — enough to last a lifetime of car rides.

All Money Work Wisdom Food Marriage Life Math Animals Aging Time Wife Family Philosophy Relationship Drinking Kids Career Music School Job

Trophy for Standing Still

Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.

Farm Career

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Quit Before They Knew

I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.

Money Finance Career+1

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Recliner Hall Of Fame

People used to laugh when I would say I want to be a comedian. Well, nobody is laughing now!

Dreams Career Persistence

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Reptile In Tailoring

What do you call an alligator wearing a vest? An investigator.

Detective Fashion Career

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Say Yes First

When you are asked if you can do a job, tell ’em, ‘Certainly I can!’ Then get busy and find out how to do it.

Job Work Career+2

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Detour Ahead

The road to success is always under construction.

Success Road Construction+2

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The Whole Trick

Find out what you like doing best and get someone to pay you for doing it.

Work Career Advice+1

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Service With A Subtext

I like waiters. They bring a lot to the table.

Restaurant Job Career

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Entrepreneur Of The Year

I tried to start a stationary business. Unfortunately, it just didn't go anywhere.

Business Money Career

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Soft Career Pivot

How would a drummer be paid if he started selling pillows? Per cushion.

Music Job Career

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Cornered At The Grill

Adults are always asking little kids what they want to be when they grow up. Are they looking for ideas?

Kids Career Ideas

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Loyalty by Ultimatum

How long have I been working for this company? Ever since they threatened to fire me...

Work Job Career

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Distance Makes The Plan

The farther away the future is, the better it looks.

Future Planning Optimism+2

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Corner Office Material

To err is human. To blame it on somebody else shows management potential.

Management Blame Work+2

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The Real Office Skill

It's not how good your work is, it's how well you explain it.

Work Career Office+2

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Time Management Genius

I always arrive late at the office but I make up for it by leaving early.

Office Work Job+2

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Career Counseling Hour

See that shadow on the wall? It's brighter than your future.

Future Roast Career+2

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Billable Loitering

I don't work here. I'm a consultant

Work Career Job+1

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Promotion Mechanics

The secret to success is to know who to blame for your failures.

Success Blame Failure+2

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Tell Them The Truth

Why do you want this job? I've just always been very passionate about not starving to death.

Job Work Career+1

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Math Checks Out

A healthy sleep not only makes your life longer, but also shortens your workday.

Sleep Work Career+2

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Slide Rule Optional

You don't need to be a genius to be an engineer!

Work Career

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