BROWSE DAD JOKES

904 jokes and counting — enough to last a lifetime of car rides.

All Money Work Wisdom Food Marriage Life Math Animals Aging Time Wife Family Philosophy Relationship Drinking Kids Career Music School Job

Two Lovely Decades Apiece

My wife and I were happy for 25 years… and then we met.

Marriage Wife Relationship+1

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Geology Has Standards

I like mountains but volcanoes are ash holes.

Nature Insult

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Always One More Increment

The definition of a perfectionist is someone who wants to go from point A to point A+.

Work Ambition Mindset

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A Floating Bargain

I bought a boat because it was for sail.

Shopping Money Pun

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Reverse Engineering Stanzas

A backward poet writes inverse.

Writing Words Work

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Big Words, Big Lizard

What do you call a super articulate dinosaur? A thesaurus!

Dinosaur Vocabulary Words+1

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Abracadabra Fetch

What do you call a magic dog? A Labracadabrador.

Dog Pet

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A Tail Of Modesty

Why do ducks have feathers on their tails? To cover their butt quacks.

Animals

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Knock Knock Foiled

Why can't you tell a dog a knock knock joke? Because they immediately start barking.

Dog Pet

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Wristless And Free

I haven't owned a watch for I don't know how long.

Time Clock Wordplay

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Tested By The Decades

Fight me if you wish but know that I am old for a reason.

Age Wisdom Fight+1

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Credentials Required, Champ

It's inappropriate to make a 'dad joke' if you're not a dad. It's a faux pa.

Father Puns Humor

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Big Animal, Small Footprint

What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter? Irrelephant.

Elephant Animals

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Bovine Comfort Class

What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk.

Cow Farm Cattle+1

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Prime Eligible Paradox

I ordered a chicken and an egg from amazon. I'll let you know…

Chicken Shopping

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Asked With Love

Is your bottom jealous of the amount of crap that comes out of your mouth?

Roast Insult

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Traffic Report Eternal

There's a stairway to Heaven and a highway to Hell.

Music

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Risk Management Lecture

You don't need a parachute to go skydiving. You need one only if you go skydiving twice.

Skydiving Parachute Logic

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Confidant Of The Year

Your secret is safe with me… I wasn't even listening.

Gossip Marriage Wife+1

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Slow Lane Connoisseurs

Why do some people eat snails? Because they don't like fast food.

Food Cooking Slow+1

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House Rules Apply

We don't approve political jokes. We've seen too many get elected.

Politics News Government

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Fiscal Catch Twenty Two

Fines are a tax you pay for doing something wrong; taxes are a fine you pay for doing something right.

Taxes Money Government+2

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History Class Cheap Seats

Communism was doomed from the beginning. Did they miss all the red flags?

History Politics Irony

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Self Improvement Loophole

My girlfriend makes me want to be a better person so I can get a better girlfriend.

Dating Relationship Romance

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